Tag: self-discovery

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M: On Conditioning and the Path to Authenticity

Before I can even beginning to delve into authenticity in some sort of deeper way I first need to address my obsession with the word authenticity.

There’s something about the word authenticity that really resonates with me. I think it is because it represents this idea of honest self? Or perhaps that it represents true originality despite living in a world that lacks originality or where no one is themselves original? Or that allows me to be original while using unoriginal material. More and more this word makes it into my vocabulary when I speak about self and a movement and my experience of life. I truly deeply creative authenticity.

I feel like it is only been in the last year or so that I have begun to understand really what it means to live authentically. Only in the last year or so have I started to establish parts of myself and delineate ideas and values that truly feel authentically mine. Many of my experiences this past year forced me to deeply question and reconsider some of my most fundamental beliefs of My reality. This process resulted in the dismantling of my ideas and then a reconstruction of something entirely new from the old.

And I think that this process of dismantling, examination, and reconstruction is the path towards an authentic self.  We are all composed of beliefs that we’ve shouldered unconsciousness,  as a process of being apart of a certain culture, family, friend group, etc.  As we grew up, we identified with different groups and subsequently assumed their values and lifestyles.  As we explored our own creativity, we copied those we admired.  We unconsciously assumed the components that made up who we are.

This leads to a sense of feeling fake, empty, discontent, etc.  It is because we don’t truly feel a strong attachment to any of our ideas or beliefs.  Because they were given to us (versus created by us), they can also be taken away.  They never fully take root.

Creating an authentic self requires discovering which beliefs we have assumed unconsciously, dismantling them in order to examine them honestly and apart from them, and the reconstructing new systems of knowing and thinking for ourselves.

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M: Reflection on Movement & Self-Discovery (Joy, Power, Purpose, Privilege, and more)

Why Move?

On Movement & The Discovery of Authentic Self

Movement & Play is an antidote to most of the personal suffering that human beings experience. On some deep level almost everyone feels insecure, afraid, separated, isolated, and unsure of his or her own authenticity and value.

Unstructured play or movement for the sake of movement is a highly authentic form of self expression.  By setting our own challenges and seeking our own solutions we engage in a very deep and personal form of self-empowerment and honest communication.  It may take a long time to move without fear of judgement, unknowing preconception, or need for external feedback, but ultimately this process of discovering your movement and creating and exploring your body is one that leads to an truly honest understanding and expression of self.

Through long term movement and in overcoming our challenges we release ourselves from our insecurities.  The universal nature of movement as a fundamental human activity helps break down barriers of isolation, for all need and participate in movement on some level.

Movement reaffirms our sense of individuality while welcoming us into a larger global community.

Miscellaneous Thoughts

Physical & Psychological Health

It goes without saying that there are serious psychological benefits to integrating movement into your everyday life.  Movement releases chemicals and hormones that positively impact your mental state.  It also of course positively impacts your body.

Physical Intelligence.

Movement is a path to physical intelligence: being able to use your body in any scenario effectively.  You fine tune the various senses and abilities, from balance to explosive power generation.  Your body is like an intelligent machine, and the more frequently you use it, the better you get at handling it.

Upkeep of the Vessel.

Take care of your body; You only receive one body in this life. Your body is kind of like a car. The longer you have it, the more miles you put on it, the more worn out it will become. It is of the utmost importance that you take care of it to the best of your ability, by putting in good fuel, winterizing it correctly, repairing parts as needed.

You only get one body in this life. It is your responsibility to take care of it. Your body is the vessel of your soul; the more healthy the vessel, the better off the soul.   We move to keep the vessel healthy, and in turn the soul happy.

Privilege

If you have the use of your body, you have the responsibility to use it. Do not be so frivolous to take advantage of a privilege you have been given. Not everyone has the use of their limbs.

Social Development

Movement, especially in the form of play with others, is an amazing medium through which to explore and develop a social identity.  Movement with others will begin to reveal to you your own insecurities and fears, as well as your personal strengths and confidence.  Social movement allows you to explore different fantasies, as well as test out various versions of potential interactions.  You are allowed, within the safe space of play, to explore who you are.

Joy

I move because it brings me joy.  Movement is one of the greatest pleasures, the use of our human bodies. It can be as satisfying as physical intimacy, as pleasurable as difficult mental puzzle, as gratifying as any great pleasure in the world.

Movement is joyous because movement is primal. It is essential to our human nature. To move is to return to that primal nature, to tap into some larger, historical energy that spans time & space. Everyone moves, before and after.  Movement is apart of culture, society, our history as human beings.

Movement is joyous because it is mine. No one can take movement away from me. Even if I had to sit still, I move. My spirit moves.  

Power

I move because it makes me feel powerful. The task of facing an obstacle, creating a strategy, testing that strategy over a course of time, refining, retesting, and ultimately overcoming (in one way or another)… this kind of mental and physical endurance to achieve a physical goal. I love it. It makes me feel like I can accomplish anything I set my body and mind to.  

Movement is one of the most all consuming and providing sources of power. Through movement, I am capable of anything. In Movement I am as capable as the next human being; nothing can hold me back. I don’t need a degree, I don’t need past experience. Everyone comes to the table with everything they need to excel and achieve human greatness: their bodies and their minds.

And you don’t need to necessarily have full or healthful function of either of those things in order to derive the power that comes through play. Again, the truest form of power in movement is the setting and achieving of personal goals, the realization that you are capable!

POWER.

Purpose

One of my favorite quotes from Marcus Aurelius goes as follows:

“In the morning, when you rise unwillingly, remember this thought: I am rising to perform the work of a human being. Why am I dissatisfied if I am going to do the very thing for which I exist? Or have I been made for this; to lie in my bed-clothes and to keep myself warm?”

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M: On the Self x2

What is the ‘self’? Characteristics, features, qualities. How do we find or lose it? How do we measure its authenticity in a world of unoriginality? Do we even need it? When and why? (functioning in society, for enlightenment, etc). IF we have it and discard it, what remains?

Response:

In my previous messy post, I discussed self as a sum of our values & needs. Values are a reflection of our beliefs and assumptions of the world and our selves. Needs are things we’ve identified as paths to happiness (sometimes accurate, othertimes not).  To retain a healthy sense of self is to find your ‘kinetic’ self, your ‘fluid’ self–self as a process rather than a thing.

The Static Self

The ‘static’ self is a reflection of a lifetime of collected beliefs and conclusions, not just about the world but also ourselves.  These beliefs, in the form of values and needs, become fixtures in our lives, organizing systems for all new experiences and information we encounter.  It takes all new information and fits it into existing values/belief systems or it discards it.

We become trapped by our own perceptions, values, needs, knowledge, etc, as these things become increasingly fixed and static. The path to happiness becomes more narrow, it’s definition more exacting. Through the deep cultivation of convictions, we in fact create our own self-destruction.

Authenticity

To personally examine and consciously choose each of your values and beliefs: Free yourself from your conceptions of the world in order to turn around and actually examine them.  Reject blind acceptance. Reject unquestioned cultural assimilation.  You may find after your examinations that those beliefs are still true for you, but without that personal examination you will ultimately lack authenticity. Your ideas are not your own, they are functional transplants pending eventual failure: Because you did not create them yourself, you can not evolve them, you can not truly understand them.

Self-evaluation and re-creation is critical to being able to evolve those ideas later and stay authentically you.

Stability, Usefulness, and the Static Self

Does static self have a place?  Static self in some ways is useful, at least as a way to interface with others.  While your true self may be fluid and kinetic; changing under the surface, prehaps this turbulance is too much for those in society to deal with.  Perhaps the ‘Static Self’ – a curated representation of who you are–is what we need in order to function in a highly developed society.

Static Self is when you earmark a point in your life, a version of yourself (complete with beliefs, values, needs), and present and re-present that version to the world. We all do this. We all become an image or a set of ideas/beliefs/behaviors to our loved ones, our families, our colleauges, etc. And sometimes, they do it to us. They capture an image in their heads of who we are, and we are condemned to it until they capitulate.

It doesn’t have to be this way, but it is easier, no? Humans crave stability. But the spiritual journey is one of great uncertainty. We need to find a balance to operate in society & to continue on our inner path at the same time.

So, I will leverage a series of static selfs against society for my ambitions, but with my most intimate of relationships I will strive to be my true self; a fluid human being in a state of constant growth and turmoil. I am a boiling sea, I am full of active tectonic plates, shifting, moaning, groaning, crunching, crushing: With my most intimate, I wish for them to be apart of the storm, an ally, a partner. I wish for them to push the plates, heat the water, agitate the storm. I wish for them to stand me up, to cool me off, to hold my hand.

Honesty, Ritual, & The Static Self

The Static Self is in many ways a dishonest representation of your current state. But the Static Self provides a sense of stability and a place of reference from which others in your life can interface. 

For those undergoing great shifts, the static self is a way to avoid scaring people off.  Most people in this world only have their static selfs, with minor variations, and can not comprehend rapid emotional and inner change.They do not depart on any deep spiritual journey–or will not until later in life.  

This is perhaps why rituals are very important in society. Coming of age, getting married, moving out, moving around, entering and ending a relationship, starting, leaving a new job, etc.  These pivotal movements are places where society accepts radical change in someones Static Self. So for most who do have a sense of fluid self, they save making a public shift until these periods.

Cultural Rituals are critical for the survival of the Static Self. Ugh could write too much on this. Skip.

What happens when we discard self?

This is one of the many enlightenments in life. Perhaps that process of defining self each day–the evaluation of values and needs–is a process of hacking away at the unessential.

If we can eliminate all superfluous needs–to need nothing for happiness–means, our day to day requires very little difficult choice.  When our values are robust and elastic, and our needs are minimal, Happiness is an ease to achieve. Happiness comes from within.

Without needs, the self ceases to exist, the ego ceases to exist. 

I honestly don’t know.